Mother.

They say having a baby changes your life.  

But it does so much more—it changes you.  

I’m not the same woman I was last year, not even close.  

It's more than just shifting priorities, adjusting focus, or reworking my daily rhythm.  

It’s a transformation, a rebirth of self—a new person, with a new mind and heart.

As a nurse in this specific field, I’ve guided mothers, I’ve witnessed the birth of new life again and again—

the bloom of countless miracles.  

Yet no sight, no whispered breath,  

could have prepared my heart for the moment when it was my turn. 

After that final push, I held my breath in anticipation for the next one, eyes still closed. Everything went dark.

It felt as if my heart stood still…

They say childbirth is the closest a woman comes to death. 

But between birth and death lies life.  

I didn’t realize you had arrived until I was told to open my eyes—

And in that moment, everything froze.

I saw you for the first time, and felt my heart beat again. The little one that grew inside of me for nine months, I finally laid eyes on you.

In that moment, my pain magically vanished, replaced by a love so crazy, it defies description.  

Ezra Augustus, you are the love that my husband and I created, the love that became you, my love.  

That day, my life was forever changed..

The greatest gift after Salvation. 

Who knew my heart could love so much??

Or that my body was capable of carrying such power, such light?  

For nine months, I waited to see you,  

and in less than nine seconds, I knew—my heart had known you all along.

Even before you I knew of your existence, my heart was expecting you. 

Ezra, you are the best piece of me. 

The best part I held onto for this moment, for you.  

You are the reason my life has changed,  

and I am grateful that God chose me to be your mother. What an honor. God knew the world needed you and chose me to be the vessel.

To be your mother. It was all worth it. 

My body, transforming, carrying, stretching, birthing, healing—  

My brain rewiring, my hormones adjusting—  

Every moment of the journey, sacred.  

Nothing I regret. I’d do it all again if it brought me to you. 

My son…. You bring us immense joy.

Our world became even brighter the day you arrived. 

And in that brightness, I find myself at so much peace.  

A wife, a mother, a protector, a creator of life.  

Because of you, I am more than I ever was.  

My heart, my soul, my very being—  

All changed, all for you.

Motherhood has been unexplainably beautiful. 

But it also has been challenging. 

The nights stretch long, and the days blur together.

Yet there’s a quiet joy in each sacrifice. 

A peace in giving myself fully to the demands of love.  

Because in giving all of me, I’ve found everything I ever needed.

Thank you for making me a mother. 

Happy 3 months.